What I think about school… in a poem…

23 09 2010

It’s all our life, its all we do
Well that of course, and drinking brew
K through 12 it really blows
Then comes college and fuckin’ hoes
From the age of six, we we’re there all day
And way back then all day we played
Now its hard and it really sucks
Just tryin’ to one day, make the big bucks
It’s boring, it’s tedious, it’s flat-out lame
It makes you feel like the Hunchback of Notre Dame
All awkward and ugly, ringing bells all day
Posted up top like a fresh toupee

So back to school and all its flaws
Fuck this shit lets break some laws
Learning about Abraham Lincoln and his big ole’ hat
And the here-and-there world combat
Wars in countries and I can’t even pronounce
And the difference between a pound and an ounce
Reading, writing, arithmetic
And like Teddy said, “carry a big stick”
Elementary school is quite mediocre
And then you find out your principal’s a smoker
Middle school is a cluster-fuck of bullshit
And I was quite the douchebag, I must admit
High school was a wild ride
Jocks, busy work, and cliques; aside

Now in college shit’s going quite swell
I’ve managed, some how, to stay outta jail
The sun setting is an excuse to drink
Wake up the next day too hazy to think
Go to class, catch a word or five
That’s what I call the college kid jive
Pull all-nighters to cram for exams
Run up in that bitch not giving two damns
Molest your exam like a three dollar whore
Then party like its 1494

So, if you take anything from my spilling of knowledge
Fuck K through 12 make it to COLLEGE
Once you’re there let the rowdiness commence
And please, for God’s sake, use some common sense
These 4 to 6 years will be the best
Just make sure you wake up in time for the test
I leave you now, like a dove be free
And don’t let you GPA fall below your BAC


It’s good as Gandhi…

8 04 2010

Another new phrase for you homo sapiens out there… It’s essentially like saying “It’s good” just adding “as Gandhi” at the end… Same use, same meaning, just a little more rowdy…

It’s good as Gandhi– everythings strait,or its alrite

somebody do something simple twoards you that could prolly use an appology…like someone step on ya kicks n they say..”ma badd”…if it dont bother u then u like..”its good as gandhi”

(This is the definition on UrbanDictionary for “its good” and I added “as gandhi”)

Looks like this scholar is a certified gangsta…

Mario Cart banana peel thing

8 04 2010

I really wish the Mario Cart banana peel thing really worked…

Close your eyes and imagine:
(I guess you can’t close your eyes and read… my b)

You’re driving down the road and some douche is riding your ass.

  1. Pull out a banana
  2. Peel the banana peel into 4 precisely even strips about 3/4 the way down the banana
  3. Consume banana (getting a rich supply of carbs, fiber, and protien)
  4. Launch  banana peel behind your car
  5. Banana peel lands on road perfectly (seen below)
  6. Douche hits banana and spins several times out of control (in place)

Open your eyes

How amazing was that?!?

And for all of you that don’t know what the “Mario Cart banana peel thing” is, you’re a douche, you’re parents hate you and you should immediately go buy at least one of the following:

  1. Super Mario Kart — (Super Nintendo Entertainment System (SNES), 1992).
  2. Mario Kart 64 — (Nintendo 64 (N64), 1997).
  3. Mario Kart: Super Circuit — (Game Boy Advance (GBA), 2001).
  4. Mario Kart: Double Dash!! — (Nintendo GameCube (GCN), 2003).
  5. Mario Kart Arcade GP — (Arcade, 2005).
  6. Mario Kart DS — (Nintendo DS, 2005).
  7. Mario Kart Arcade GP 2 — (Arcade, 2007).
  8. Mario Kart Wii — (Wii, 2008).

thats my brain… kinda

until next time, keep it crunchy ninjas…

For Your Information…

8 04 2010

The 2010 FIFA World Cup, June 11-July 11, will be broadcasting up to 25 of the matches in 3D… DAYUM! Thats right, you’re gonna be chilling on your couch with these ninjas in yo face playing some fútbol. Pretty incredible. Unfortunately, you have to have one of these new 3D TVs which will run you like $3000ish. But still, DAYUM! So if you have $3000ish dollars burning a hole in your pocket go get a 3D TV and holla at me around FIFA time.

Until next time, keep it crunchy like peanut butter…

Microsoft Surface…

8 04 2010

The Microsoft Surface is another technology that will change the world as we know it. Surface is a computer built into a coffee table, and its 30-inch screen is controlled by touch rather than by a mouse or keyboard. Is see a future with these in many of our establishments but thats just me. Here’s a look at it, let me know what you think….

My take on the new Tablet-era…

8 04 2010

Now that everyone has had 5 or so days to shit themselves (including me) over the new iPad, we have seen the future of computing and the integration of revolutionary technology into our daily lives. The iPad is badass! Haha… I don’t think anyone can really say anything else. I mean it is a fresh idea that will get profected as the years go by. The iPod was launched in late 2001 and is now, almost 9 years later, in its 6th generation and has also branched off into different models; Nano, Shuffle, and Touch. So, I think the iPad is now ballin as hell and will continue to go ham on ninjas for years and years to come.

But with that said, I don’t think I will be buying an iPad. I have always been a Windows guy and I am a big fan of Google. Google is doing shit for real. I applaud Apple for being the first in the industry to put out* this revolutionary, which they are quite good at with the iPod accounting for more than 70% of the Mp3 market.

Back to the tablets, the first big alternative to the iPad is the HP Slate. I was not able to find an expected release date, but once again Apple beat PC to the punch fo sho. As with the iPad, I won’t be getting a Slate either. You can choose for yourself from this comparison:

I will rather be waiting on the release of the Google Tablet, also with an unknown release date and just a prototype of what it may look like, but anything from Google is always top tier. The Google Nexxus One (Google’s alternative to the iPhone) is a badass device, it just took them a couple more years than Apple.

buy wisely ninjas! peace!

* I’ve decided I’m going to start italicizing words/phrases in my posts that sound provocative/dirty/crude/etc…

Kelly Regas…

7 04 2010

You look like one of the girls on Mercy on NBC. Her name, on the show, is Veronica Flanagan Callahan she is a nurse who has just returned from a tour of duty in Iraq. It’s your calling… To be a United States of America Army Soldier. In real life she’s Taylor Schilling, the star of Mercy (and thats about it).